


Steve's letter

by AllotropicBi



Series: The Lord of the Onion Ring [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-09
Updated: 2016-03-09
Packaged: 2018-05-25 16:21:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6202393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllotropicBi/pseuds/AllotropicBi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is strictly connected to the larger body of work, <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/works/4471085/chapters/10161581">We're a Power Couple and Everyone Knows It (But Us)</a> and is put separate from the text just for ease of reading alone. It will be later updated with a handwritten version of the note.</p><p>Don't read this before you've read ch33 what are you doing here??? Get back to the main fic, go on! Ya filthy animals.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Steve's letter

**Author's Note:**

> This is strictly connected to the larger body of work, [We're a Power Couple and Everyone Knows It (But Us)](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4471085/chapters/10161581) and is put separate from the text just for ease of reading alone. It will be later updated with a handwritten version of the note.
> 
> Don't read this before you've read ch33 what are you doing here??? Get back to the main fic, go on! Ya filthy animals.

When was the last time you felt your heart race at the mere touch of their skin? When was the last time you had to stop yourself from reaching out, from letting yourself taste the lure, the addiction, the potential of being happy? Look me dead in the eye, answer me this, and feel shame, regret, anger; feel anything you can until it’s all eviscerated, and you can face them again with a simple smile and a habitual, non-consequential interaction.

The tightness in your chest that makes you feel like you’ll explode whenever they smile? The softening of your rough edges – like charcoal being smudged from a harsh line into the sweetest, most sorrowful fade – just by being near them? The instantaneous calm which courses through your entire being? Turn it away. Take it, turn it away, and breathe. You built these walls; you beat them down, then isolated yourself like you had no other choice. You live with this now, the choices you made.

The taste that has severed your mind since the day you let it consume you is not yours to yearn. The warmth that you crave is in your head. The moan that you drew from them was not for you.

His smile is his alone. Just as you are not his, he is not yours.

Let the anger come now, the regret. Let the bitter taste in your mouth make you think twice.

What are you now?

What are you now that you’ve let yourself drown in everything he exudes; what are you now that you’ve fallen so deep you don’t know who you are? Take him and what are you?

Let the fear settle deep in your bones, let it remind you that to answer this you must keep him, and to keep him you must let be.

The inherent warmth of metal to your cheek is not yours.

**Author's Note:**

> Find me on [tumblr](bkcybvrnes.tumblr.com)


End file.
